MHC Library Quotes #9

When examining the periodical wall in the Vera Bracken Library the following conversation could be heard:

"We need to have more pretty looking magazines out here." - Female Staffer
"Yeah, we need Vanity Fair, or something like that. Oh, wait. There it is." - Male Staffer
"Oh, yeah we do have it."
"Yep, with Gisele Bündchenon on the cover."
"Who's that? [Inspects the cover.] Yeah, she's gorgeous."
"Yep, you could say that, but if I were a guy...."
"'A guy'?"
"No. Yeah. That's not what I meant to say."
"Huh?"
"What I meant to say is that, 'If I were less of a gentleman....'"
"Oh."
"Yes, I would agree and throw in a few more expletives."

MHC Library Quotes #8

As one employee passes another...

"I forgot I was thinking." - staffer #1
"You forgot you were thinking?" - staffer #2
"Yeah, I forgot I was thinking."
"How do you forget you were thinking?"
"No, it was about that smell. I forgot about it."
"Oh. Okay, I think I get it now."

MHC Library Quotes #7

After fixing a falling light panel, a male employee jokingly comments that he must tuck and adjust his shirt to cover his “muffin tops” (a.k.a., love handles). After a conversation about modern body type terminology and the meaning of the term “butterface,” the following conversation took place:

Female Employee - "Yes, we saw a woman the other day. She was tall, blonde, and had a nice figure. [Female Employee #2’s Name] and I didn’t see her face, but we assumed she must be beautiful. Maybe not, but we wish we had some of that."

Male Employee "Ummm... you do realize that if I said that, I could lose my job. You might want to rephrase that."

[Laughing hysterically at her faux pas.] "That’s not what I meant. We wish we were that tall. We wish we had a little of that height."

"Okay. I’m going to go now."

MHC Library Quotes #6

When peering over the should of a cataloguer, another employee expressed interest in what she was cataloguing, but was soon disappointed.

"Oh, that looks interesting. [Pauses.] Oh... [lamentingly], too bad it's in French."

MHC Library Quotes #4

A discussion about the state of modern stamps...

"Did you see that the U of L is on a stamp?" - male staffer #1
"No, really?" - male staffer #2
"Yes, they have a picture of the main building."
"Oh, the old U-Hall?"
"Yeah, that's the one."
"I heard that you can get custom stamps made in the States now. You can send in a photo and you will get a book of stamps that you can use. There might be something like that in Canada even."
"Really? Ooo, you can pretend your the Queen."
"Umm..., or not."
[Laughter]"Oh, that's right sorry."

By the way, you can can get custom made stamps made to order in Canada. Navigate to: http://www.picturepostage.ca, and begin creating your custom stamps.

MHC Library Quotes #3

During a birthday celebration, an odd exclamation could be heard...

"Penises!" - female staffer

This was said by one female staffer to another during the photo sessions - foregoing the traditional, "Say:'Cheese!'" Laughter was had by all.

P.S., I have the video to prove this.

MHC Library Quotes #2

Another discussion that was heard in the Vera Bracken Library:

"I can't get it up. I'm 2 or 3 inches too short." - female staffer
"That's supposed to be the man's excuse." - male staffer

This discourse took place as the female staffer attempted to hoist a box to a tall shelf.

MHC Library Quotes #5

With the Curriculum Collection (for Education students) comes some unique challenges to maintaining the integrity of the collection. Some items are "toys" and you need to have the right number of pieces to "play" properly. To this end, some staffers have to mark/tag the individual pieces - whether there are 10, 100, or 1000. This is a conversion that took place around such "tagging."

The scene: a female staffer begins the tagging colourful plastic tiles at a desk. Two male staffers take notice, and do what guys do with colourful blocks: they start to build thing [blame Lego]. After a while they ask, "What are these used for?", and so it begins...
"Well, you take a group of 12 tiles and you play math games with them." - female staffer
[One male staffer has 12.]
"Okay and now what?" - male staffer #1
"Well, if you have 12 and split them into 3 groups, how many do you have in each group?"
"4." [Both male staffers respond simultaneously.]
"Nooo."
[A look of befuddlement is expressed by each male.] "Huh?"
"Oh! No! Wait...! [A look of shock followed by laughter.] Sorry." [An extreme look of embarrassment.]
[Laughing] "Uh, yeah, I was going to say...."
The second male staffer breathes a sigh of relief that he wasn't wrong.

MHC Library Quotes #1

We all say some goofy things once in a while. Some real gems fly around here, so I cannot help but record some of the things that I have heard or said. In all cases, including my own, the identity of the speaker(s) is confidential with the exception of the gender. Additionally, these are not exact quotes, but very close paraphrases.

Case #1:

"I don't like putting hard things in my mouth. No, wait, that's not true." - a female staffer discussing her preference of candy

Stay tuned for more.